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Skip Lackie
03-09-2007, 09:14 AM
Worth repeating for those who may be new to the hobby:

DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest and flings your beer across the room, splattering it against that freshly stained heirloom piece you were drying.

WIRE WHEEL: Cleans paint off bolts and then throws them somewhere under the workbench with the speed of light. Also removes fingerprints and hard-earned guitar calluses from fingers in about the time it takes you to say, "Yeou shoot...."

ELECTRIC HAND DRILL: Normally used for spinning pop rivets in their holes until you die of old age.

SKIL SAW: A portable cutting tool used to make studs too short.

PLIERS: Used to round off bolt heads. Sometimes used in the creation of blood-blisters.

BELT SANDER: An electric sanding tool commonly used to convert minor touchup jobs into major refinishing jobs.

HACKSAW: One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board principle. It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, and the more you attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your future becomes.

VISE-GRIPS: Generally used after pliers to completely round off bolt heads. If nothing else is available, they can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.

WELDING GLOVES: Heavy duty leather gloves used to prolong the conduction of intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.

OXYACETYLENE TORCH: Used almost entirely for lighting various flammable objects in your shop on fire. Also handy for igniting the grease inside the wheel hub you want the bearing race out of.

WHITWORTH SOCKETS: Once used for working on older British cars and motorcycles, they are now used mainly for impersonating that 9/16 or 15mm socket you've been searching for the last 45 minutes.

TABLE SAW: A large stationary power tool commonly used to launch wood projectiles for testing wall integrity.

HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK: Used for lowering an automobile to the ground after you have installed your new brake shoes, trapping the jack handle firmly under the bumper.

EIGHT-FOOT LONG YELLOW PINE 2X4: Used for levering an automobile upward off of a trapped hydraulic jack handle.

TWEEZERS: A tool for removing wood splinters and wire wheel wires.

E-Z OUT BOLT AND STUD EXTRACTOR: A tool ten times harder than any known drill bit that snaps neatly off in bolt holes thereby ending any possible future use.

RADIAL ARM SAW: A large stationary power saw primarily used by most shops to scare neophytes into choosing another line of work.

TWO-TON ENGINE HOIST: A tool for testing the maximum tensile strength of everything you forgot to disconnect.

CRAFTSMAN 1/2 x 24-INCH SCREWDRIVER: A very large pry bar that inexplicably has an accurately machined screwdriver tip on the end opposite the handle.

AVIATION METAL SNIPS: See hacksaw.

TROUBLE LIGHT: The home mechanic's own tanning booth. Sometimes called a drop light, it is a good source of vitamin D, "the sunshine vitamin," which is not otherwise found under cars at night. Health benefits aside, its main purpose is to consume 40-watt light bulbs at about the same rate that 105mm howitzer shells might be used during, say, the first few hours of the Battle of the Bulge. More often dark than light, its name is somewhat misleading.

PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER: Normally used to stab the vacuum seals under lids and for opening old-style paper-and-tin oil cans and splashing oil on your shirt; but can also be used, as the name implies, to strip out Phillips screw heads.

STRAIGHT SCREWDRIVER: A tool for opening paint cans. Sometimes used to convert common slotted screws into non-removable screws.

AIR COMPRESSOR: A machine that takes energy produced in a coal-burning power plant 200 miles away and transforms it into compressed air that travels by hose to a Chicago Pneumatic impact wrench that grips rusty bolts which were last over tightened 50 years ago by someone at Studebaker, and instantly rounds off th

Chucks Stude
03-09-2007, 10:47 AM
That just about sums it up.
Great post.

Chucks Stude
03-09-2007, 10:47 AM
That just about sums it up.
Great post.

raprice
03-09-2007, 11:56 AM
OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! That's what those tools are for.
Enjoyed the post and all the effort that went into it.
Thanks.
Rog

'59 Lark VI Regal Hardtop

raprice
03-09-2007, 11:56 AM
OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! That's what those tools are for.
Enjoyed the post and all the effort that went into it.
Thanks.
Rog

'59 Lark VI Regal Hardtop

Guido
03-09-2007, 12:31 PM
I think that I have participated in or been a victim of most. The item on the heat transfer capabilities of vice grips brought back some painful memories.

About 20 years ago I was attempting to replace the blades on a bushhog that I owned. For thoose not familiar, it had a "stump jumper" pan on the bottom that the blades attached to that I was trying to dislodge. For some unknown reason I was using a heavy ratchet with a pipe extension without luck, so I resorted to heat.

I would heat it, then crank on it with ratched and pipe and then repeat the drill once it cooled down. During this process I instinctively grabbed for the socket and gave it a spin to be sure it was going in the right direction. Needless to say, the socket seemed to retain heat better than the spindle and nut assembly! [:0]

Not one of my smartest moves.....

http://thumb14.webshots.net/t/53/453/1/21/36/2964121360097493054pVJTFL_th.jpghttp://thumb14.webshots.net/t/57/757/2/88/4/2023288040097493054SEKowB_th.jpghttp://thumb14.webshots.net/t/18/19/8/37/21/2050837210097493054IYBJJL_th.jpghttp://thumb14.webshots.net/t/59/559/1/43/57/2876143570097493054jKVhDw_th.jpghttp://thumb14.webshots.net/t/22/22/0/2/68/2589002680097493054ftBuBw_th.jpghttp://thumb14.webshots.net/t/28/28/8/30/30/2075830300097493054aSSlFv_th.jpghttp://thumb14.webshots.net/t/59/459/2/23/86/2067223860097493054YoeGMx_th.jpghttp://thumb14.webshots.net/t/28/28/5/18/33/2537518330097493054OgEKcN_th.jpg
[b]Guido Salvage - "Where rust is beautiful"

Studebaker horse drawn buggy; 1946 M-16 fire truck; 1948 M-16 grain truck; 1949 2R16A grain truck; 1949 2R17A fire truck; 1950 2R5 pickup; 1952 2R17A grain truck; 1952 Packard 200 4 door; 1955 E-38 grain truck; 1957 3E-40 flatbed; 1961 6E-28 grain truck; 1962 7E-13D 4x4 rack truck; 1962 7E-7 Champ pickup; 1962 GT Hawk 4 speed; 1963 8E-28 flatbed; 1964 Avanti R2 4 speed; 1964 Cruiser and various other "treasures".

Hiding and preserving Studebakers in Richmond, Goochland & Louisa, Va.

Guido
03-09-2007, 12:31 PM
I think that I have participated in or been a victim of most. The item on the heat transfer capabilities of vice grips brought back some painful memories.

About 20 years ago I was attempting to replace the blades on a bushhog that I owned. For thoose not familiar, it had a "stump jumper" pan on the bottom that the blades attached to that I was trying to dislodge. For some unknown reason I was using a heavy ratchet with a pipe extension without luck, so I resorted to heat.

I would heat it, then crank on it with ratched and pipe and then repeat the drill once it cooled down. During this process I instinctively grabbed for the socket and gave it a spin to be sure it was going in the right direction. Needless to say, the socket seemed to retain heat better than the spindle and nut assembly! [:0]

Not one of my smartest moves.....

http://thumb14.webshots.net/t/53/453/1/21/36/2964121360097493054pVJTFL_th.jpghttp://thumb14.webshots.net/t/57/757/2/88/4/2023288040097493054SEKowB_th.jpghttp://thumb14.webshots.net/t/18/19/8/37/21/2050837210097493054IYBJJL_th.jpghttp://thumb14.webshots.net/t/59/559/1/43/57/2876143570097493054jKVhDw_th.jpghttp://thumb14.webshots.net/t/22/22/0/2/68/2589002680097493054ftBuBw_th.jpghttp://thumb14.webshots.net/t/28/28/8/30/30/2075830300097493054aSSlFv_th.jpghttp://thumb14.webshots.net/t/59/459/2/23/86/2067223860097493054YoeGMx_th.jpghttp://thumb14.webshots.net/t/28/28/5/18/33/2537518330097493054OgEKcN_th.jpg
[b]Guido Salvage - "Where rust is beautiful"

Studebaker horse drawn buggy; 1946 M-16 fire truck; 1948 M-16 grain truck; 1949 2R16A grain truck; 1949 2R17A fire truck; 1950 2R5 pickup; 1952 2R17A grain truck; 1952 Packard 200 4 door; 1955 E-38 grain truck; 1957 3E-40 flatbed; 1961 6E-28 grain truck; 1962 7E-13D 4x4 rack truck; 1962 7E-7 Champ pickup; 1962 GT Hawk 4 speed; 1963 8E-28 flatbed; 1964 Avanti R2 4 speed; 1964 Cruiser and various other "treasures".

Hiding and preserving Studebakers in Richmond, Goochland & Louisa, Va.

60Lark
03-09-2007, 03:09 PM
THAT LOOKS ABOUT RIGHT TO ME ;)

http://im1.shutterfly.com/procserv/47b6ce20b3127cce8d0e3b50356c00000000400CcNWTlozYsb http://im1.shutterfly.com/procserv/47b6dc03b3127cce970d7aafd15f00000010100CcNWTlozYsb
Studebaker Fever
60 Lark
51 Champion
Phil
Arnold, Missouri

60Lark
03-09-2007, 03:09 PM
THAT LOOKS ABOUT RIGHT TO ME ;)

http://im1.shutterfly.com/procserv/47b6ce20b3127cce8d0e3b50356c00000000400CcNWTlozYsb http://im1.shutterfly.com/procserv/47b6dc03b3127cce970d7aafd15f00000010100CcNWTlozYsb
Studebaker Fever
60 Lark
51 Champion
Phil
Arnold, Missouri

Skip Lackie
03-09-2007, 03:38 PM
quote:Originally posted by raprice

OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! That's what those tools are for.
Enjoyed the post and all the effort that went into it.
Thanks.
Rog

'59 Lark VI Regal Hardtop


I appreciate the compliment, but I cannot take credit as the author. A friend sent it to me -- and he probably didn't originate it either.

Skip Lackie
Washington DC

Skip Lackie
03-09-2007, 03:38 PM
quote:Originally posted by raprice

OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! That's what those tools are for.
Enjoyed the post and all the effort that went into it.
Thanks.
Rog

'59 Lark VI Regal Hardtop


I appreciate the compliment, but I cannot take credit as the author. A friend sent it to me -- and he probably didn't originate it either.

Skip Lackie
Washington DC

showbizkid
03-09-2007, 06:44 PM
I've got a whole garage full of "curses" tools. Wonder how I came by all those?


[img=left]http://members.cox.net/clarknovak/lark.gif[/img=left]

Clark in San Diego
'63 F2/Lark Standard
http://studeblogger.blogspot.com

showbizkid
03-09-2007, 06:44 PM
I've got a whole garage full of "curses" tools. Wonder how I came by all those?


[img=left]http://members.cox.net/clarknovak/lark.gif[/img=left]

Clark in San Diego
'63 F2/Lark Standard
http://studeblogger.blogspot.com

stude freak
03-09-2007, 09:55 PM
Me thinks someones been snooping around my shop watching me.

David Baggett Mantachie,Ms.

stude freak
03-09-2007, 09:55 PM
Me thinks someones been snooping around my shop watching me.

David Baggett Mantachie,Ms.

hank63
03-10-2007, 04:48 AM
Combine these tools with Murphy's law, and you've covered just about all classic car issues.
/H

hank63
03-10-2007, 04:48 AM
Combine these tools with Murphy's law, and you've covered just about all classic car issues.
/H